Lynnie – Aug 5 2015
So last Monday night I had an experience that will go down as a long lasting memory. (I am not full time .. however I have lived just under it for under 20 years……. my id is still boy) I live with a partner who is an American and visits the USA several times a year. She was in Az. for a few days and I decided, having nothing to do on a Monday eve, to drive to a favorite butcher shop a 30 minute drive from my home. It was fall and I was wearing a super cute vintage jacket I found in a market the week prior and a pair of jeans with boots. (This will add to the story) It was mild weather however there was the chill of fall in the air.
The visit to butcher shop was nice and as always they trip over me with good service. I bought a steak to grill and headed home.
I popped on the highway heading back home, realizing that I was in the crush of Toronto rush hour commuter traffic. One thing my partner has noticed about Canadian drivers is that they tailgate on a regular basis tempting fate.
I was on the highway for about 10 minutes, at one point the car in front came to a stop quickly and I safely came to a stop, Stopping with about 4 car lengths between me and the car in front, I looked in my mirror and guess what? I saw the car behind coming toward me and thought there is no way the driver is stopping. He hit me, hard. I really had no idea what happened as he drove my car into the stopped car in front of my poor car. Miraculously I came to my senses and was still intact and alive. I picked my glasses up off the floor of the car, checked my hair in the mirror and thought .. “the next few hours are going to be very interesting.”
I left my car and the driver who hit me rushed over making sure I was ok. I dialed 911 and in a few minutes 2 fire trucks,(with about 15 firemen) an ambulance, 2 police cars and 2 tow trucks showed up. I was the only female.. other than the one police officer.. and everyone was concerned for my condition. I handed my id to the cop… and she looked at it and back at me. I approached her, saying I was transgender. Her only comment was “mamn no problem I am just glad you are not injured.” I stood at the median and was interviewed by the paramedics. I was shivering as the night was getting really cold.The female paramedic offered me a blanket. The firemen were milling about… one kept coming at me and asking my about my poor Audi. He asked me several times if I wanted to warm up in “his” fire truck” and I thought “are you kidding me .. you are actually flirting with me.” (Actually this part of my experience was kinda cute…. I mean how often do you get hit on by a fireman) I had conversations with everyone. They pulled our cars off the highway. My poor car was a write off… and in the end I was given my paperwork and left with the tow truck heading home.
One of the feelings I am left with is that other than the cop knowing my birth gender the rest of the group just saw a woman who was somewhat in distress. I could have fallen apart, or worse lost my composure and broken down. (I did have a good cry when I was safely home) I did manage to hold my head high and just being present with who I was in a stressful situation as I worked thru the experience as well as any gal.
One thing experience has taught me is that people treat you with respect if you project confidence and are present in the place you are. This for me meant acknowledging the stressful situation I was in and allowing others to take care of me. This meant.”.. Not that I was happy about it but having the grubby tow truck driver drive mr home. Ack!
I am grateful I was not seriously hurt. I am grateful I worked thru a very scary situation with class and a balanced attitude. Another experience for the journal.
A footnote…. I was chatting with a guy I know the next day (I know him from work …. He does not know I am trans) He said a friend he has hit an Audi last night on the highway. However he hit a woman…. I just shrugged and smiled.